New York

New York

I was always one of those “stop making New York a character in your story!” type of people. But alas, here I am and I’m about to make New York a character in my story.


Because New York fucking deserves it.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m an LA girl.  Born and raised.  I love Los Angeles.  There aren’t many people that can claim the title of native here and hold it.  I proudly proclaim LA my home and have no desire to change that.

I’ve done it all.  I’ve seen it all.  I’ve lived 2 blocks from Kevin Costner.  I’ve gotten high with Steve-O.  I’ve run into Ice-T and his possy of classless women and I’ve seen Gary Coleman eating at a Black Angus.  I’ve run into John Lithgow and half the cast of The L-Word (which I watched religiously wondering if it might be easier living as a lesbian).  I’ve seduced drug counselors while intoxicated, worn cuffs because I was good and bad, fucked cops while on duty and worn a strap on.  To put it mildly, there isn’t much that I haven’t done, seen or tried.

Then I met New York.

It took me 33 years but I finally made my way to The Big Apple.  Suddenly, I was naïve, inexperienced and vulnerable.  Weak, shy and afraid.  Completely lost amongst a sea of lights, never ending buildings and high rises surrounded by people talking to themselves.  It was outstanding.

But the one thing that stood out the most to me?  I didn’t see one woman running around the city in Manolo Blahniks with flower broaches the size of a baby’s head.  Not sure if I was disappointed or relieved.  I had anticipated that I might stick out since I help pay to keep the lights on at Old Navy and make it my custom never to walk into a clothing store that sounds French or uses the European size chart.  My sexy comes out when my clothes come off, not on.

While there, I saw a hilarious play, visited several bars, drank obnoxious amounts of alcohol, ate insanely good food and met some of the most amazing people that any one person has any right to meet.  Having only really had three full days to soak in all that the city had to offer I still didn’t get to do and see 1/10th of what I’d wanted to see or do.

I also met “him”.

Amidst the glitz and glamour, tourists in petticoats and booze induced awe over the sheer awesomeness that is Times Square, there he was.  Off to the side, standing guard and keeping watch ready to fight crime should it suddenly arise in the city that never sleeps.  Dressed in blue from head to toe with four little letters embroidered onto the neck of his turtleneck.  NYPD.

Having already taken half a gazillion pictures with any man in uniform I could find I almost passed up the stunning 6’2” man in uniform.  It’s not like we could actually exchange phone numbers, go out on a date and spend the next 16 hours in bed.  Wait, this is me we are talking about.  Of course we could and that’s exactly what we did.

My initial greeting went something like this:

“You are stunning.  When do you get off work?  Can I have your number?  I’m going to marry you.”

I’m lucky I didn’t get arrested.

He just smiled, asked if he could also have my number in return, posed for a few pictures and I was off to go visit a neat little tequila bar 49 walking miles from Times Square.  The next night he picked me up after he got off work and we spent the next 16 hours together.  Mostly naked and it was amazing.  His lips were my kryptonite and we were both avid disciples of the Kamasutra.

Having sworn off cops I find it somewhat ironic that within five minutes of meeting one 4,000 miles from home I was proposing and professing my undying love and affection.  But the most amusing part of it all were the questions from friends asking how I had met him and what I had done to obtain a date with such an obvious catch.  Such an interesting question really.  Having 87 years of dating experience under my belt and being told in countless books by countless “dating experts” to follow certain rules I did the unthinkable.  I had simply gone up and talked to him.

I’ve been home for a little less than a month now and we have still been in daily contact.  He plans on visiting me sometime in the next month or so and I eagerly await his visit.  Not in the last 10 years have I met a man that has had me so utterly flustered, smitten and willing to swear off the dating market than my Mr. NYPD.

I’ve heard it said many times before that you know whether or not you want to sleep with someone within minutes of meeting them.  Within minutes I knew that I wanted to marry him.  I’m fully aware that my crazy has yet to come to the surface and I’m certain he has demons of his own.  You don’t make it to your 30’s without obtaining a few.

Realistically, I will probably never see him again.  He’s a New Yorker and I’m a So Cal girl.  Long distance relationships are hard.  I’ve have issues dating men that live an hour away in Orange County.  But, fuck it.  I may be a realist but deep down I’m also a romantic and I’m going to ride this train as far as it will take me.  If that means acquiring a new zip code and switching to public transportation then so be it.

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Before I begin, let me apologize for this post being so disjointed.  It was difficult for me to figure out how to cram so much bullshit into one entry 😉


  1. nicole
    January 05, 05:16 Reply
    " I was off to go visit a neat little tequila bar 49 walking miles from Times Square" Bahahahha. Now THAT'S NY for ya. 'It's right around the corner', 30 minutes and two blisters later you're there! :) You kill me every time M! Seriously though, you are such a talented writer. I can't wait to hear more about NYPD hottie.
    • missmelisamae
      January 05, 08:40 Reply
      My sister told me that the average New Yorker walks 4 miles a day and then pointed out that I get sore feet (or as we call it "mall foot") while at the 99 cent store. This was her way of telling me not to move :) I can't wait to have more to tell you about the NYPD hottie! XO
  2. Lusty Sagittarian
    January 05, 06:45 Reply
    Yes, I know you, the realist romantic. The Sagittarian with a logical head who can calculate how many men they'd be missing out on if they committed to this one. I know you. And I'm rooting for this man to follow through, continue to knock your socks off, and keep you interested. xoxo <span class="cluv">Lusty Sagittarian recently posted..<a class="a7aadc1a89 825" rel="nofollow" href="">girltrueheart- How did he get a 2nd chance RT @Carolina-Tweets- I love scruff on a man RT @BelleInBows- I do love Brads scruff</a></span>
    • missmelisamae
      January 05, 08:41 Reply
      It's about time, right?!? We shall see...only time will tell ;)
  3. Jackie Summers
    January 05, 06:54 Reply
    Realistically, what are the odds of meeting an on duty cop and forming an instant connection? Exactly. So fuck the odds, enjoy the moment for as long as it lasts. NYC loved you as much as you loved it! oxo JFB
    • missmelisamae
      January 05, 08:41 Reply
      I'm missing you as much as I'm missing NYC. Can't wait to plan another trip!
  4. Butter & Honey
    January 05, 07:27 Reply
    Love it! Great writing...definitely leaves me wanting more. I can't wait to hear how it progresses. P.S. I love, love, love that you 'broke the dating rules'! Power to the people. <span class="cluv">Butter & Honey recently posted..<a class="8ea83acef7 827" rel="nofollow" href="">MY THOUGHTS</a></span>
    • missmelisamae
      January 05, 08:42 Reply
      Exactly! I've never been an advocate of the rules and will firmly go against them as long as I breathe. So glad you liked it!
  5. Nikki04
    January 05, 08:44 Reply
    Sounds like the perfect NYC visit. Yum. Plus - amazing how we sit here and discuss dating... and yet... sometimes it is so easy. Further, never underestimate the "I just went and talked to him". PS. It's not easier as a les-bean. Whole other can o' worms. Just sayin. <span class="cluv">Nikki04 recently posted..<a class="211f2835bc 832" rel="nofollow" href="">‘Tis the season- My Resolutions for Other People</a></span>
    • missmelisamae
      January 05, 08:57 Reply
      It was pretty near perfect. Looking forward to the sequel!
  6. Roger
    January 05, 09:59 Reply
    Love the life you live, live the life!! <span class="cluv">Roger recently posted..<a class="d7a426d9c5 834" rel="nofollow" href="">Cuban Market with Great Variety!</a></span>
  7. Wilmaryad
    January 05, 10:13 Reply
    Happy New Year, Melisa. I think straight women fare better than gay men in instantly declaring their flame and proposing. If you go up to a gay guy and say you wanna marry him, he'll utter 3 words: Drama. Baggage. Psychiatry. :) That said, and despite us all being the incorrigible romantics, moving to NY after a month of meeting the guy is too rushed. But then, what to do with those unforgettable 16 hours of body talk? *sigh* Girl, you're damned and I'm sure it feels oh-so good right now! Lucky you :D <span class="cluv">Wilmaryad recently posted..<a class="3c6ed58ec0 836" rel="nofollow" href="">Love a Dick for His Dick</a></span>
  8. Asa
    January 05, 13:09 Reply
    Much MM love right back from this NYer!!! ♥
  9. Mikael
    January 05, 13:10 Reply
    Your guts to go up and initiate that relationship is truly inspiring... I love your all-out approach! Sounds like quite the experience! I hope you do get to see him again! <span class="cluv">Mikael recently posted..<a class="4d4340bf53 838" rel="nofollow" href="">MikShorty Top Posts</a></span>
  10. Clap
    January 05, 15:25 Reply
    Awwwwww *This is literally how I feel after reading this* Hope it all ends well for you......... Oh, and Your Life Is Like A Movie ;-)
    • missmelisamae
      January 05, 22:23 Reply
      Thanks, hon. And you are totally right...I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried. Ok, maybe I could but really I couldn't. Or could I? ;)
  11. Damian
    January 05, 16:24 Reply
    Hey spicey, I'm glad that you took New york by the horns and owned it. I never expected any less from you and you don't dissapoint. I can't wait to read more, and I hope you make it back very soon.
  12. Brown-Eyed Girl
    January 05, 21:50 Reply
    When I was in New York at Times Square I also met a 6'2" cop with a body that made me want for a towel to remove my drool. The way he hung around talking to the locals I could tell it was his beat. I walked up and spoke to him. And he answered in a steroidal Mickey Mouse voice. Tell me this is not him. Please.
  13. Charlotte
    January 12, 12:35 Reply
    GOOD FOR YOU, GIRL!!! That is so awesome that you just walked right up to him and made small talk. Sometimes that's all it really takes (but why do I always think it'll be so terrifying? It's what we make of it, right?) So glad to hear your experience with New York was as sexy as the city itself :) <span class="cluv">Charlotte recently posted..<a class="fa8afaf5fb 928" rel="nofollow" href="">date 2 with matchcom date 1</a></span>
    • missmelisamae
      January 13, 08:19 Reply
      Walking up to a hot stranger is never easy. That's why I drink.
  14. Booyaa!
    May 10, 06:48 Reply
    [...] sure all of my reader (yes, you) are wondering what has happened to the love of my life, Mr. NYPD.  Basically, he’s stupid, I’m amazing, his loss, it didn’t work out, yada, [...]

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